Hey guys, I have a Serious Feminist Question.
Why do we all suddenly think that “friend zoning” is a sexist concept?
I’m just understanding this less and less as time goes on. It’s like the entire part of the Internet that’s aware of feminist issues suddenly decided that men are the only ones capable of whining and behaving unreasonably when a friend they’re romantically interested in turns out not to share their feelings.
Women* do this all the time, only instead of “that bitch only wants to date attractive assholes! why doesn’t she like me? i’m SO NICE”, it’s “that dick only wants to date attractive shallow bitches! why doesn’t he like me? i’m SO NICE” This is a thing that happens to women too! We are also capable of being narrow-minded enough to assume that our attractiveness or perceived lack thereof is the only thing keeping someone from sharing our romantic interest!
I’m just…really baffled by this. The only thing about it that I can see as being sexist is the Nice Guy element of “I deserve this woman because I was nice to her”, which I don’t see a lot of women doing—but I DO see women go “I deserve this man more than that woman because she’s a SLUT and I’m not a SLUT”. But, like…you can be friend zoned and not be a douchebag about it. I don’t understand why saying that someone friend zoned you is sexist. I have been friends with plenty of guys who did not share my feelings! I refer to this as being friend zoned, because I just kind of thought that was slang for the state of being thought of platonically by someone you find attractive?
Like, yes, being an entitled taint is bad, and stopping being friends with someone when you find out they won’t sleep with you is shitty. I just don’t know why people are calling it sexist all of a sudden.
* In this context I am talking about women who are attracted to men, since the idea that this concept is sexist is based around the actions of men who are attracted to women.